I won’t lie, I really battle with my faith sometimes. This is something that I’m very much aware of. I’ve seen God’s hand in my life and know for a fact that His timing is always perfect. Even though I know this, there are times when I seem to forget and end up getting very frustrated.
But even in the midst of the frustration, God still has a way of reminding me of the journey I’ve walked with him. In the last couple of years I have seen prayers that I had long forgotten about being answered and it’s always such a heart-warming feeling. It really brings me to tears. I have so many examples of answered prayers that have left me in awe.
A frustrating time
After completing my Journalism qualification in 2009, I struggled to find an internship. I remember emailing different publications and broadcasters, even offering to work for free just so I could get the experience I needed. Months passed and nothing happened and I spent a year and a half at home doing absolutely nothing. This was one of the most frustrating times of my life. I was angry and bitter and wondered if God had forgotten about. At that time, my relationship with the Lord was non-existent but I still believed in Him because of the way I was brought up.
My mother was also frustrated because she didn’t know what to do with me. Fortunately, something came up and I ended up working at a community newspaper for six months. This was an unpaid internship, but I really didn’t mind. While working there, I applied for an internship at the Media24 Journalism Academy. They called me for an interview in Johannesburg and I was very excited.
My silver lining
The interview process was very challenging because it was a panel of some of the country’s most influential people in the world of Journalism, including editors. There were about six or eight people and I was very nervous! “What are the chances?” I thought to myself. Some of the people who had come for the interview looked like they knew more about Journalism than I did, and I really didn’t think I stood a chance. Anyway, the interview went better than expected and I was accepted.
When my internship at the community newspaper ended at the beginning of 2011, I moved to Johannesburg and started a new journey. The graduate programme was one of the best in the country (I believe). I got exposed to both print (magazines and newspapers) and online Journalism. I worked in Johannesburg for a few months and then moved to Cape Town for the rest of 2011. I then moved to another Media24 publication in 2012 in Pietermaritzburg.
God has a better plan
Why am I writing such a long story just to talk about faith? Well, this is to remind whoever is reading this about how great God’s plans are for our lives. I cried so much about being unemployed for almost two years and I honestly didn’t think my situation would change. But God had other plans for me. He had something better — more than I could ever ask or imagine.
Reflecting on that journey has been really helpful in my current situation. In this season of my life I am waiting for many prayers to be answered and I sometimes find myself wanting to give up. When I remember that Siyathemba who was in her early 20s and how God came through for her, I cannot help but be encouraged. We sometimes look at other people’s stories for inspiration and motivation forgetting that we also have our own journeys to reflect on, and be inspired by.
As I mentioned at the beginning of this piece, I really do struggle with my faith. I’ve often heard that a new level requires a new level of faith. I think this is very true. I have so many stories of how God came through for me in different seasons of my life. These are the stories that keep me going when I don’t see my way out of certain situations. Even now, as I’m writing thing, I still have questions and some doubt, but despite that, I believe that God will come through for me once again. He always does!